Pure Sex Radio

Getting Back to Childhood Innocence

What does our sexual sin cost us? Do we take time to evaluate the losses and how they are affecting our lives today?

In this episode, we share a story of a man who had a terrifying nightmare that vividly illustrates what it’s like to be confronted with how evil steals innocence and peace from our inner child. We then explore what this man discovered from this dream and how to respond to your own losses of innocence and peace, and what the journey back to protecting your innocence can look like.

For help with understanding how the inner child impacts sexual acting out, visit InnerChild-SexAddiction.com.

More Resources:

• Going Deeper by Dr. Eddie Capparucci
• 40 Days of Purity Online Course
• Find a Counselor

Related Podcasts:

• Going Deeper: How Your Inner Child Impacts Your Sex Addiction
• Understanding Fear and Sadness
• Why Your Family of Origin Matters

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The Why & How of Boundaries in a Recovering Marriage

Why are boundaries necessary for marriage restoration after sexual betrayal? And how does a couple navigate establishing and enforcing such boundaries in a redemptive way?

Today we have back with us Karla Downing to help us answer these important questions. Karla is the founder of ChangeMyRelationship.com. She offers Christian marriage help and Christian relationship help as a speaker, author, counselor, and Bible study teacher. As one who has walked her own path of relationship struggles, she can speak to these matters with both experience and empathy. 

In this conversation, Karla defines what boundaries are, why they are necessary to rebuild a broken marriage, how they are enforced, various pitfalls to boundary-setting and boundary-keeping, and what the real “goal” is of restoration. 

To learn more about Karla and her relationship resources, visit ChangeMyRelationship.com.

More Resources:

• Help for Husbands
• Help for Wives
• God, Sex, and Your Marriage by Dr. Juli Slattery

Related Podcasts:

• Helping Wives "Detach with Love" in a Difficult Marriage
• Recovery Discovery 026: Boundaries
• Gaslighting and Deception

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The Powerful Effects of Shame-Free Accountability

Why does most “accountability” not work in recovery from unwanted behaviors? Is there a better way to engage others in recovery that does work?

My guest today is Chandler Rogers. He is the creator of Relay, an online platform that helps you discover a team of support. It is built on two key principles that are foundational to recovery:

1. Connection
2. Teamwork

 

In our conversation, Chandler shares his own story and struggle with porn and the keys to his healing journey. We also talk about the importance of authentic community in recovery and how the Relay app can help in that quest.

To learn more about Relay, visit JoinRelay.app.

More Resources:

• Be Broken Support Group Network
• First 7 Days for Men
• Integrity Webinar for Men

Related Podcasts:

• Recovery Discovery 024: Community & Accountability (Part 1: Defining It)
• Recovery Discovery 025: Community & Accountability (Part 2: Living It)
• Porn, Technology, and Self-Control

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God, Sex, and Your Marriage

“Most married Christians cannot answer the question, ‘What does God say a good sex life is supposed to look like?’”

This statement is made by our special guest, Dr. Juli Slattery. Juli is an author, speaker, and co-founder of Authentic Intimacy, a ministry dedicated to reclaiming God’s design for sexuality. 

In our conversation we discuss how Juli answers this question about a good sex life from her latest book: God, Sex, and Your Marriage. 

We first cover why there is a disconnect between God and sex, even in the church. Then we unpack the four pillars of a great sex life: 

1. Faithfulness
2. Intimate Knowing
3. Sacrificial Love
4. Passionate Celebration

 

To learn more about Juli and her ministry and resources, visit AuthenticIntimacy.com.

More Resources:

• Java with Juli podcast
• 40 Days to Oneness devotional
• Made for Purity online course

Related Podcasts:

• The EPIC Challenge for a Great Marriage
• What are Your Sexpectations?
• What is Intimacy?

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”I’d Rather We Fight than Not”

Is all fighting in marriage bad? Don’t most of us hate conflict and try to avoid it at all costs? What if, however, there is good to be found in conflict and disagreement?

In today’s episode, Stephen and I are going to unpack the positive dynamics of fighting in marriage. Discover what anger often means, how conflict is revealing what your spouse truly wants, and how to develop gratitude for the passion of differences.

For helpful resources, visit Bebroken.org.

More Resources:

• 40 Days to Oneness by Stephen Cervantes
• Not All Stress is Bad
• Marriage Restored

Related Podcasts:

• Finding Rest for Your Marriage
• 4 Skills to Transform Your Marriage
• Rebuilding a Healthy Marriage After Betrayal

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Best of 2022: 3 Levels of Sobriety

Originally Aired on February 22, 2022

View this episode on Youtube

In this episode, Stephen and I unpack what we are calling the 3 Levels of Sobriety, especially focusing on the third level. These categories are broken down into 1) real people, 2) media, and 3) thoughts. If that doesn’t quite make sense to you, that’s exactly why you need to listen to this episode.

If you are a man who wants to grow in integrity by digging deep into what goes on between your ears, listen closely because true sobriety goes beyond just eliminating unhealthy behaviors. You must work on your thoughts and this episode will help you with practical ideas for thought sobriety.

A resource that will help you retrain your mind toward a life of sexual integrity is our 40 Days of Purity online course. Learn more and enroll at 40days.PureLifeAcademy.org.

More Resources:

• Grace-Based Recovery by Jonathan Daugherty
• Unwanted by Jay Stringer
• Gateway to Freedom 3-day workshop for men

Related Podcasts:

• Addicted Thinking vs. Healthy Thinking
• Replacing Escaping and Hiding with Healthy Thoughts & Behaviors
• Guy Thoughts on Emotional Awareness and Maturity

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Best of 2022: Overcoming Shame and Embracing Your True Identity

Originally Aired on March 8, 2022

View episode on Youtube

Today’s guest is Matt Cline, the Director of Restored Ministries in Edmonton, Alberta. He is a speaker and coach who considers it an honor to tackle the epidemic of pornography and help individuals and marriages be restored from the destruction caused by sexual sin and shame. 

In this episode, Matt shares some of his story and key principles and insights that are proven to lead people from brokenness to wholeness. Our conversation addresses taking a serious view of sin, combating shame, understanding your true identity, and reclaiming a godly perspective on the body.

Learn more about Matt and his ministry’s resources at RestoredMinistries.ca.

More Resources:

• Help for Men: Men.Bebroken.com
• Help for Women: Women.Bebroken.com
• Help for Families: Family.Bebroken.com

Related Podcasts & Media:

• Recovery Discovery: Identity
• Recovery Discovery: No More Shame
• How Identity Shapes Everything

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Restoring Broken Pastors for Kingdom Use

Pastors are not immune to sexual temptations and sexual strongholds. But many pastors feel isolated and “trapped” from reaching out for help with their private sexual struggles. 

On today’s episode, we have Mark Denison join us to share with us some key principles from his new book, Broken Vessels, on how pastors can get help to break free from sexual strongholds and even still be used by God for kingdom work. 

To learn more about Mark and his ministry, visit TheresStillHope.org.

More Resources:

• Broken Vessels: Restoring Broken Pastors for Kingdom Use
• Gateway to Freedom 3-Day Intensive
• Recovery Minute

Related Podcasts:

• A Hopeful Response to Church Leaders Struggling with Sexual Sin
• Pastors on Porn
• Reframing How the Church Views Sexual Purity

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Rebuilding a Healthy Marriage After Betrayal

Today’s guests are Matthew and Joanna Raabsmith. They are the directors of The Raabsmith Team, coaches and therapists that love to help individuals, couples, and families create life-giving change in themselves and in their relationships.

In today’s episode, Matthew and Joanna will help couples understand the ins and outs of rebuilding a healthy marriage after betrayal. There is hope and thriving intimacy is possible even after betrayal. This conversation will be especially beneficial for couples who are wanting restoration. 

For more information about Matthew and Joanna and their resources, visit RaabsmithTeam.com.

More Resources:

• Intimacy Pyramid Training (virtual workshop)
• Online Care Groups for Wives
• First 7 Days programs (for men and wives)

Related Podcasts:

• Affair Recovery Through a Trauma Lens
• Rebuilding Your Marriage After Sexual Betrayal
• Hope After Betrayal

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What Can Stunt Your Emotional Growth Mission?

For nearly two decades we have been inviting men to embark on an emotional growth mission, not merely a sexual purity mission (as good as that is). But what is an emotional growth mission and what are the challenges and possible stumbling blocks to emotional growth? 

In this episode, Stephen and I define the emotional growth mission and share over 10 thoughts and ideas that could stunt this mission. 

To get started, or keep going, on your emotional growth mission, watch the 7-part Emotional Training for Men webinar series at Bebroken.org/etm-webinar.

More Resources:

• 40 Days of Training for Your Soul
• Untangling Emotions by Groves and Smith
• Free Integrity Webinar for Men

Related Podcasts:

• How to Experience Excellent Emotional Connections
• Essential Truths to Heal and Mature Your Broken Emotional System
• Do Your Emotional Beliefs Lead You to Connection or Disconnection?

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